"Stop Comparing this to Toddlers and Tiaras!": Cheer Competition

This morning I woke up aching all over and tinged orange, which can only mean one thing. We had another cheer competition this weekend. We hauled our oversized makeup bags and sparkly bows all the way back to the Birmingham NEC, this time for Legacy Dream Extreme.

I haven't changed much in 20 years apparently

As per usual, the bus became some kind of frantic beauty salon on wheels, with teasing combs, eyeliner and cans of hairspray flying left, right and centre. By some miracle we managed to get there without anyone blinding themselves with a mascara wand, but the stress of having to apply winged eyeliner whilst on a moving vehicle threatened to ruin team morale for the day.

This time we had to wear our hair in giant, back-combed ponytails. Personally I hate wearing my hair up in any way, shape or form because it exposes by ridiculous Dumbo ears, but I'm a sucker for huge hair so I ended up loving it. The only issue I had with it was that my ponytail wanted to curve around the sides of my face, which made me look disturbingly like I did when I was three years old and my mother thought I'd look cute with a bob.

The competition itself went brilliantly. Every stunt hit, there were only two minor wobbles and this time I didn't feel the overwhelming urge to run off the mat during the pyramid to be violently sick. A win all round, I would say. We weren't even phased by our music cutting out towards the end of the routine.

As my friend, Helen, pointed out after we had finished performing, "You just have to keep going."
"Oh yes!" I agreed. "I've seen enough episodes of Toddlers and Tiaras to know that no matter what happens (if your musics cuts out, if you fall over, anything) you just keep going."
"I wish you would stop comparing this competition to Toddlers and Tiaras." Said Helen.
"There are rhinestones and big hair. It's pretty much the same thing." I insisted.

And then came the awards ceremony (or, as I kept accidentally referring to it all day long, crowning). I loved the way Legacy set it up. All the teams from all the divisions were called out one by one and we all sat on the mat. It was like a sea of sparkly, oversized bows! Then, in true American fashion, (because Legacy is run by Americans) the presentation of prizes for each division was accompanied by the cheesiest of music, presumably to create suspense. Naturally, I loved it, as I do all things cheesy and over the top.

And we came fourth! Not last! Sure, some teams were hoping for first or second, but for us not coming dead last meant we had significantly improved since last time. After all, half the team is new, most of them have never cheered before and Future Cheer last month was the first time a lot of us had ever even stepped foot in a cheer competition. So fourth place was a major win for us!

But the day wasn't over. First we all had to commit to the odious task of brushing all the back-combing and hairspray out of our hair (which I can confirm was both painful and exhausting) and then we headed back to the Holiday Inn for the night. And can we pause here to clarify that a three-quarter-sized bed is not meant to fit two people, especially when it's not actually a bed, but a sofa bed?

That night some of us went out for a meal, some of us stayed in the hotel and ordered pizza, and some of us drank what I can only assume was an excessive amount of alcohol. The next morning when the party-goers climbed onto the bus I was glad I'd opted for nothing more than a few glasses of wine with my cheesy chicken. Hangovers are bad enough without adding a three and a half hour bus journey into the mix.

So our weekend went spectacularly well! Our team performed better than we ever have before, came away with a fourth place trophy, and I got to stuff my face with chocolate in the hotel room. I don't think I could have asked for anything more.

For more cheer competition craziness, you can watch my Cheer Vlog here:

"Just Squeeze your Butt and go up in the Air."

My post-university life has continued to idle by in a really boring way. I have no money, nothing to do, no where to go and, worst of all, Jo Frost's Family Matters has finished for the summer so I have nothing to watch while I eat my poorly prepared lunch. On the up side, I'm doing really well at Rollercoaster Tycoon.

I have, however, taken up a new hobby. Hayleigh and I started cheerleading a few weeks ago. If you can look past the fact that I have no co-ordination, upper body strength or balance then it's the perfect sport for me. You know, as in I like big bows and rhinestones. I have an abundance of enthusiasm, but a distinct lack of talent. 

I tried out cheerleading in university and I loved the whole jumping around, throwing people up in the air thing. Plus they had great jackets. But it was really cliquey and high heels were banned from socials. So that didn't work out for me. But this club is totally different. The girls are all lovely and in no way judge the standard of my forward rolls, which are wonky to say the least.

Initially it was a shock to the system to attempt handstands and cartwheels for the first time in over fifteen years. There was a lot of flailing. And falling. Then there are the stunts. Trying to muster the strength to get someone up in the air is a lot harder than it looks. And after last night's practice I'm convinced I'm going to have a foot-shaped bruise on my right boob. On top of that my left wrist hurts and I pulled my groin attempting a somewhat over-zealous jump.

But it's fun! Last night Hayleigh and I were the first pair out of the team bonding game because I couldn't remember the rules and just collapsed on top of her in a state of panic. It was a bizarre and hilarious point in our friendship. So was the awkward head-butt we did when we caught the flyer and kind of accidentally kissed each other.

Perhaps it's a good thing my life has been a little dull lately. There's no way I could deal with random late-night adventures with every muscle in my body aching.

UPDATE!

I simply must share my childlike excitement over the new cheer bows I got in the post. Lauren wanted one for her cheer try-outs yesterday (she did a lot of standing in the corner pouting so I doubt she made the team) and I got really jealous and ordered one for myself. Obviously. I mean, they are obnoxiously large and sparkly. What's not to love?

They're made by Bella Bows on Etsy and look at them! They are absolutely amazing! The detail is fabulous and the quality is great. This lady has some of the nicest designs I've seen and the lowest postage we could find (bonus!) because everyone knows the best cheer bows come from America.

I only have two questions:
1. Can I wear it casually around town because I love it so much?
2. If Lauren doesn't make the team, will it be acceptable to steal hers?