My First Blog Post: My Life in a Nutshell

Attention world! I am finally starting a blog and I'm willing to be entirely open about the fact that I have no idea how that works. Eg, what is a 'streamlined post editor' and why is it relevant to my life? Assuming there is anyone out there who actually wants to read my ramblings, how do they find me on this huge big invisible thing we call the internet? And, most importantly, how will I ever choose a photo for my profile? And if you have made it this far into the blog then there's no turning back now. On with the actual blog...

If I was David Copperfield, I might tell you about all the events surrounding my birth. But, seeing as I'm not, I'll just jump in with the main facts. At 21 years old I find myself back at my parents' house during the summer break from uni, and very, very single.

I'm getting back into the swing of being single. Whole days go by without me charging my phone because there's no one I'm obligated to speak to. I can choose to go an entire two weeks without shaving my legs. I just devoured a whole packet of biscuits and I'm not even concerned about the consequences. The single life is a simple life where anything and everything is possible. My underwear doesn't even have to match!

But humans are like penguins. However happy we may be, stuffing our faces with chocolate digestives and living on the edge with our purple bras and orange knickers, nature is eventually going to convince us that we need to be part of a pair. Luckily, unlike penguins, we get to try a few relationships out and aren't stuck for eternity with the first guy who waves his flippers at us.

So I have come to accept my single life. Moving back to my parents' house has not been such an easy transition. Of course, when you've been at uni for eleven weeks, have no clean underwear, have been living off Ready Brek for the majority of that time, and are too afraid to walk around your house without socks on in case you contract some kind of third world disease, then you can look back at your parents' house like a fond memory. I couldn't wait to return to the land of clean towels and cooked meals.

The reality is always the same though. After the first four days the novelty of having me home wears off and my loud music, constant mess, and banging on the door drunk at 4am when I've lost my key, slowly start to drive my mother mad. In return, her strange ideas about how often the living room should be hoovered, love of Corrie, and inability to use any form of technology, leave me baffled and aggrieved.

And that's where I am. Unable to work a blog, but determined to write one. A partner-less penguin. Slowly but surely driving my mother to the brink of insanity. Welcome to my life. And my blog.